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Expectations for Your Child

When our daughter was born, it didn’t take but a few hours for me to start planning out the successful life she would have.  I was modestly thinking that she could very well be the first astronaut, turned doctor, turned US President.  That’s not too much to ask, right?  And while I do hope that she has great success in her life professionally, I think it’s worth describing the girl and woman I hope and pray my daughter becomes.   Here are some of my more realistic hopes, expectations, and prayers for her:


Expectation #1 for my Child: That she will be happy.

I want to do everything in my power for my daughter to have a happy childhood and adult life.  I have no plans of truly spoiling her, but I will provide the best childhood I know how.  From trips around town, vacations, playing in the park, and so much more, I want to provide her the opportunities to be happy and pursue her American right of happiness.  It’s going to be tough as I bet most parents with grown children can attest to, but it’s now one of my top priorities.

Expectation #2 for my child: That she will be kind

I hope to live a life that models the kindness I hope she shows to everyone she meets.  Throughout my life I’ve known truly kind people, and people that I just feel sorry for due to how mean they are at most times.  While I believe that almost everyone can be kind, living a life where people recognize that you are kind is completely different.   I hope that my daughter finds great joy in being kind to others, following the golden rule.

 

Expectation #3 for my child: That she will be a Godly woman

My wife and I are going to do our best, with a lot of help from the Man upstairs, to raise our daughter and any future children to love the Lord.  I believe this is the most critical prayer I have for my daughter, as it is the best foundation for the rest of the hopes and expectations I have for her.  A Godly woman was a must for me, and I pray that my daughter’s love for the Lord will eventually lead her to fall in love with a Godly man (even though the thought of her dating or being married already scares me).

Expectation #4 for my child: That she will strive to learn

A great education is a cornerstone of a successful life.  I pray that not only will she be great in pre-school, K-5, middle, and high school, but that she will also excel in her collegiate years and beyond.  I hope she enjoys learning new things at home, at school, and in her professional career. 

Expectation #5 for my child: That she will help others

I pray that my daughter truly loves helping others.  From simple things like holding open doors for people or sharing, to perhaps joining me at the blood drives or spending a good amount of time volunteering.  It’s important to put others before you, and I want my daughter to find that joy that comes with helping others.

Expectation #6 for my child: That she will succeed professionally

I bet most parents hope this for their children in one way or another.  I’m not saying that I want her to be the CEO of a Fortune 100 company (although I wouldn’t necessarily object), but rather that she will find a career that’s in line with a passion of hers.  So if she works for a non-profit, becomes a nurse, or manages a boardroom, I hope she finds a fulfilling line of work to which she can devote her life.

Expectation #7 for my child: That she will be a great big sister

Thinking down the road a couple years, I really hope that she is a great big sister.  I have no doubt that she and our future children will have the arguments and such that come with siblinghood, but I pray she and her brother(s) and/or sister(s) can learn to love each other and that she will look out for them and care for them in the way I think an older sibling should.

Expectation #8 for my child: That she will be a great mother

And thinking way down the road, I pray that she is a fantastic mother.  If she gets the “mother” gene that runs in our families, then she’ll do great.  Whether she turns out to be like her mom, my mom, my mother-in-law, or any of our grandmothers, then I will be so proud.  I pray that she raises her children with some or all of the hopes and prayers I’ve listed out here for her.

4 Responses to “Expectations for Your Child”

  1. caramieandtheboyz said…
    Great blog! I wrote something similar not too long ago.

    http://caramieandtheboyz.wordpress.com/2011/10/28/what-my-son-isnt-perfect/

  2. I have read several blog posts written by you tonight, and I will just say it is refreshing to read a father’s honest, loving, and authentic words about parenting. You are invested in your family, and it is apparent in your words. Thank you for being such a wonderful role model to all parents, including me! I look forward to following you on Fsacebook and Twitter!

  3. rick ackerly says:

    All good values, of course. We all know that children rise (or sink) to expectations, and the spirit of your visions for her is great. You believe in her.
    Warning 1: Children to not have a right to happiness. The Declaration of Independence says that our founder thought that we all have a right to PURSUE happiness. The pursuit is our right. One of the biggest things that could interfere with your daughter’s happiness is you trying too hard to make it happen. A parent’s role is to support her efforts—whatever they are. She may decide that she like challenges, and the pursuit of the challenges can often manifest as frowns, grumbling, cursing and crying.
    Warning 2: Some of the expectations are laws which you will enforce (e.g. that she will be good to her little sister.)
    Warning 3: Others expectations will have to be defined by your daughter (what does success means, what does happy mean?
    Warning 4. Happiness as a goal is a formula for unhappiness. And success is less a function of anything you can do and more a function of her ability to take risks, struggle and fail and try again.
    Finally, expectations can be a double-edged sword. They can communicate, “I believe in you.” They can also communicate pressure to measure up. Her self-esteem and sense of efficacy is a function mostly of the frequency with which she sets a goal, designs a path to it, and struggles toward it. You cannot give her this, but you can interfere.

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